New Book for Women

I had the privilege of working with this new author on her new book Things Men Say.. It’s hiliarious, lively, and a great addition to any woman’s collection…

As a life coach is so amazing to watch my clients make their goals and ambitions come true…

| photo fun |

…i am a sucker for uploading photos to sites that give you a messed up look. my other photo fun post kept me busy for a couple days. this one is just as simple and just as much a waste of time.

yearbook yourself and get some bad hair – on the head and the chest, if you don’t already have some. you can choose looks from the early 50’s to the late 90’s.

i used the site to generate hideous pix and put together a nice image for my special guy to remember me by.

| Agent_Em |

| fred flare |

…ok, so you’re shopping online and everything is redundant and overwhelming….

why not choose a site that has a plethora of ridiculous>wonderful>original>inappropriate>exhilirating items to inspire you?

as listed in dozens of popular mags, check out fredflare.com and peruse through hundreds of items that you’ve NEVER seen or thought of as a consumer.

some of our favourites include:

‘Stuff on my Cat Calendar‘, ‘Superman Tee‘, ‘hopping yodelling lederhosen‘, and’C-3P0 USB Flash Drive‘.

(….we also recommend using an automatic database application such as Wists to keep track of your redonkulous wishlist!)

Love Lynda & | Agent_Em |

| analysis paralysis |

| WHAT IF TODAY’S ADVERTISERS CREATED THE STOP SIGN ? |

…this is going to be a rant…
….this vid makes me laugh and cry with despair. this is a very accurate rendition of corporate decision makers – or lack thereof. the fact that it is similar to what i’ve been dealing with for the last four months, makes me want to put Agile in a headlock and strangle Wiki and Jira.
I f*ckin hate MS Project!

LOL – you can find more despair on thewallstreetfighter.com

| Agent_Em |

| douchebags |

….there are many definitions for the term Douchebag:

A douchebag usually assumes the form of a hair-gelling pretty-boy but can also be described as an overzealous, pompous, or vexatious asshole that most people wish were killed with a Mortal Kombat fatality.  – urbandictionary.com

They’re flexing in their skin-tight t-shirt, invading women’s personal space at the bar and going on and on about their goddamn promotion.  – cracked.com

the best site that i’ve found for Douchebag Research and visual index of Douchebaggery is www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com

the site focuses on the definitions of douche as it applies to social situations with women…the mere existence of the phenomenon is constantly questioned and developed with categories, stories and commentary….such as:

| Agent_Em |

| smart & sanitary |

…in tradition of WTF Wednesdays, here is a vid that keeps coming back into my life and making me laugh. it’s crude and comical, but it’s also got staying power. cheers to mental marketing…

| Agent_Em |

| banana hammock |

ok……these 2 dudes were posing in their speedos at the beach. i watched them as they were striking matching poses – they’re like bookends! what possesses a hairy overweight balding man to flounce around in only a brightly coloured nut hugger? (is it a European thing?)

i barely have the courage to wear a bikini, yet these exhibitionists are bearing it all. (and what do men DO about the crotch spiders anyways? is there even a concern there?)

let’s just keep the rules straight – with a help from some experts:

The Speedo aka the budgie smuggler, dick tog, competition brief, bather, dick sticker, banana hammock or the grape cape was not designed for the normal male. (This post is directed toward men. If you are a woman who wears a man’s Speedo you are clearly not normal and need to cease and desist immediately!!!)  There are of course exceptions to every rule including this one. If you are a Normal Person who falls into any of the following categories Speedos are perfectly acceptable.

1. If you are a competitive swimmer and/or diver. This does not refer to you and your buddies racing at the community pool.

2. If you are a Lifeguard who is required to wear one. Yes. This actually happens in some countries

3. If you are David Beckham or you look like David Beckham. If you are either of those you are clearly not normal. You are a god. Call me sometime.

4. If you look anything like the guy in the white speedo above. Once again, you are not normal. You are a god. Please do women everywhere a favor and wear a speedo everyday!

If you do not fall into one of these categories please do yourself and everyone else a favor and refrain from wearing a Speedo, in public at least.

For more about this phenomenon, check out:

normalpeoplenews

| Agent_Em |

| the next artistic movement? |

| sucking life out of art |

there’s a kind of exploitation of art that creates a false representation of quality. i started thinking about this whilst washing my hands in the office today. the ‘da vinci’ soap dispenser is a daily utility that i have used without really thinking about it. what would da vinci say if he knew his identity was reduced to a mounted plastic vessel for public bathrooms? …look…he’s frowning!

Simulacrum: a slight, unreal, or superficial likeness or semblance.

Verisimilitude: something, as an assertion, having merely the appearance of truth.

so, here we have two versions of the Mona Lisa that are presented with a commercial flair.  what we don’t realize, is that the existence of mass replication actually diminishes the value of the original artifact. these images are a simulacrum of the real thing. when you can see multiple interpretations of an image at any given time, you lose the respect and feeling of awe you get from the real artifact.

Lego and Starbucks should get their own creative inspiration!

| Agent_Em |

| face transformer |

| artsy face |

I have spent waaay too much time fooling around on this site:

http://morph.cs.st-andrews.ac.uk/Transformer/

it’s really simple

you can choose what gender, race and age you are. after you upload your picture, you have a plethora of choices to alter your  image including; changing your race, cartoon, baby, and artist render.

Beware! Some are uber-disturbing.

( ‘drunk’ mode for example )

| Agent_Em |

| All About The Tanqueray |

| i love gin |

i’m going to a baseball BBQ tonight, and everyone else will be drinking from the keg or bringing cans of beer. will i drink my dandy cocktail out of a sketchy red plastic cup? you betcha!

add soda and lemons…that’s all you need.

fin

| Agent_Em |